When your loved one is living with a memory diagnosis, one of the more helpful things you can do is establish rituals. Rituals, or consistent routines, help those who may have poor short-term memory or general problems with anxiety due to memory loss, as they're more likely to recognize what they're doing or a specific time when they're meant to be doing it.
In dementia care, specifically, having rituals keeps a basic structure that can be reinforced when necessary to help trigger memories or provide a feeling of security and comfort.
Rituals and routines are essential for those with memory diagnoses. Consistent routines, especially those maintained from the time before dementia's onset, help your loved one maintain a familiar schedule. Routine also builds a basic structure to the day and helps enrich the life of a person living with dementia or any other memory diagnosis.
For these reasons, establishing a ritual now could be the right option as you work to ease your loved one's memory loss symptoms.
If you haven't set up a routine or ritual in the past, one thing you might consider doing is setting up tea time. Tea time could be a specific time of day when you sit down with tea and a few snacks to talk with your loved one. It could also be code for your dinner time or a short walk outside with tea in hand.
Having a particular time of day when an event happens helps those with memory diagnosis have something to look forward to. In many cases, even if they forget the specific ritual, they're more likely to remember it once it begins. This is especially true if you surround the ritual with the same smells, sounds and tastes daily.
Consider setting tea time for the later afternoon or early evening to help combat the symptoms of sundowning.
Sundowning refers to changes in your loved one's behavior that may occur later in the day and as they approach bedtime. While this is called sundowning and seems to refer to sunset, it doesn't necessarily happen at that time of day and can vary by person. Sundowning is most likely in the middle and late stages of dementia.
Sundowning isn't well understood, but it's believed to be caused by:
These and other factors may lead to the symptoms of sundowning, such as hallucinations, delusions, anxiety, agitation and emotional distress.
Rituals and routine may help prevent or mitigate the symptoms of sundowning. For example, if you know the onset of these symptoms is linked to hunger, setting a midday tea time could help stave off hunger before dinner and minimize the onset of sundowning.
There are other rituals you can try beyond tea time. Some are simple memory reminders, while others are rituals that may happen only once or twice a year. Here are five additional rituals you may want to establish with your loved one.
First, consider going to annual events. If you've always gone to see the Christmas tree being turned on downtown, continue that activity for as long as it's safe to do so. When you do this, you create continuity in your loved one's life, which can help them stay grounded.
Another option for building a routine is having a common thread woven into each week. For example, you could come every Thursday to take your mother to get her hair and nails done, or you could arrive at the community each day after work to have a cup of tea with your dad.
Dinner dates can be a good option for building a routine. Establishing that you'll be with your parent every Friday, for example, gives them a way to track time and stay present on that day.
Entrance and exit routines can be helpful for some people with dementia. For instance, consider knocking three times when you enter every time you arrive or saying a specific phrase each time you leave. These simple routines can help with remembering and even jog your loved one's memory as to who you are or that you've just arrived or are leaving.
Finally, consider establishing a bedtime routine. Consider the order of operations, such as brushing teeth, combing hair and grabbing a book to read before turning off the lights. A good bedtime routine may help prevent anxiety in the evening.
All these options can help make life easier for those with dementia and memory loss. Consider what routine your loved one may enjoy and what may be the most helpful, and look into establishing it now.
